Once upon a time there was a boy and a girl who fell in love and moved into a three hundred square foot, one bedroom apartment. There small little kingdom was the perfect match, as were they. Until the kingdom gathered too much wealth and they had to move on.
But forreal, that apartment was great. Even better was looking at it, empty once again, with all of our stuff in a house. As we cleaned it out, ready for the final walk through with our landlord, Ben asked if we should set up our blow up mattress like we did when we first moved in.
Absolutely not, I laughed. I enjoy my own bed way too much to move backwards in life.
Ben did bring those first days to my mind though, and before I knew it I had realized just how much our relationship has evolved since then. As we sat one night, thinking of those early days of living together we realized that there were so many little things we learned about each other that we would not have if we had not lived together. All little things, but little things that just brought us closer in all kinds of ways.
Our relationship has changed so much since we met in October 2015. We moved in together, got engaged, got married, bought a house, and still manage to fall in love with each other every day.
After a long conversation, a bottle of wine, and a few emotional outburst from yours truly, we managed to create our own list of 5 Things that Change When You Move In Together:
You very quickly become unshy about your body and its functions:
This kind of goes without saying but deserves a place here. My sister-in-law swears that her now husband didn’t know she went to the bathroom, to put it lightly, for the first two years of their relationship. I don’t know how she accomplished this but it was not the case for Ben and I and unless you are really sneaky, probably won’t be for you.
Actually, here are your options. 1) just go ahead and be open about it. Everybody poops, right? (p.s. have you seen that child’s book? the best!)
Personally, option 1) was perfection for me and I am thankful for it now, not even a year later.
You quickly figure out who will be doing the cleaning in your household.
SPOILER ALERT: It is probably you. Okay, that was unfair to assume. My cousin is the neat freak in every relationship he has, including friends. Must be a family thing…
Anyway. You can’t really know how clean/messy someone is until you are going to bed in the same place every night. Does he put his dishes in the sink and not rinse them off? Does he throw his laundry in a hamper or on the floor? Does he know how to even do laundry? Does he know you’re supposed to wash your sheets? These are all things that are learned quickly and actually leads me to the next point I need to make…
You argue about the dumbest things
Think of the dumbest you and your boy have ever had. Now, think of something even dumber. I promise, with everything inside of me, you will argue about the dumbest, pointless shit when you move in together. You will argue about a poorly worded text message, just to start some kind of argument.
You stay up way too late on a random night just talking:
There was one night when both Ben and I had to wake up early for work and it was that night that we decided to stay up until three in the morning. We got deep and by the time I finally fell asleep with him kissing my fore head, I felt impossibly closer to him. Yes, we had stayed up late before but when we were up late like that before moving in together we were trying to squeeze whatever we could into our time. This was something completely different. We did not need to stay up sharing so much about ourselves with one another, it wasn’t planned and it wasn’t a stab at fixing anything in our relationship. It was just two people getting even closer than they already were. That night I fell even more in love with him, something I didn’t think possible.
Sorry…end sappy paragraph.
You fall into a boring routine:
And it is the best routine you could have ever imagined. Ben and I do just about everything together but every night, we settle in and watch 2-10 episodes of our Netflix show of the month. It never fails and yeah, it is really boring, especially when I take a look at what all other twenty somethings are doing on Friday nights but I love it and wouldn’t change our boring routine for anything.
This isn’t the most complex list but it is a starting point, one that comes from what I noticed when we moved in together. So what about you!? What did you learn as soon as you moved in together, drop me a comment and let me know!